Michael Ealy On How Important It Was To Learn His Wife's Love Language
On Friday (May 3), The Intruder hits theaters and the film's trailers promise to give us the steamy love scene between Michael Ealy and Meagan Good we didn't know we needed. In the psychological thriller, the stars play a couple who are taking the next step in their relationship and buying their first home, only to find that they are now stuck with an uninvited houseguest from hell.
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While the couple conjured up some major chemistry on-screen for the film, in real life, the stars are both married to partners who they are very much in love with.
Like all couples, celebrities aren't immune to miscommunication. We all have a desire to be loved, but not just any old way. A few years back, the internet was introduced to the concept of love languages by Gary Chapman and had the relationship world shook. It was then that we learned that misunderstandings can happen when it comes to the way we love, too. Michael Ealy, who has been married to his wife, Khatira Rafiqzada, since October 2012, recently sat down with xoNecole and opened up about how learning to love in his wife's language transformed his marriage for the better.
The 45-year-old actor revealed that understanding the way your partner needs to be loved lies in paying attention to the little things. He shared, "There are definitely lessons that come with staying with somebody and living with someone. Most of it is learning how to meet them at their level. Right? So for my wife, celebrating her birthday and I think certain other holidays really matter to her. They don't, to me. My birthday could come and go. It doesn't matter to me."
Instagram/@MichaelEaly
According to Michael, the key to a lasting relationship is knowing when to put your partner's needs before your own, even if that means taking time to celebrate special occasions you never may have cared about before. He shared that although he never put much importance on his birthday, understanding the sentimental value that certain holidays have for his wife made him change his perspective.
"I had to not approach her birthday in the way in which I approach mine. That was a hard lesson to learn and it took me a couple of years to figure it out. Because it was important to her, I realize, yeah, this is who you married. Like you married someone who, for whatever reason, this matters to them."
Michael says that being conscious of what matters to your partner is important because although certain acts of love may be menial to you, they can mean the world to the person you love. The Intruder actor told xoNecole, "So I have to kind of put aside whatever philosophy I have to kind of get through my life and any holidays in my world and be like, 'okay, this matters to you. I'm going to do whatever it takes so that you can be happy on this day because it makes you feel heard.'"
Spoken like a true heartthrob.
His co-star, Meagan, who has also been married to her husband, author and TV producer, Devon Franklin for the past five years, added to this sentiment and revealed the most important lesson she's learned since becoming a wife. The actress explained, "One of the biggest things I've learned is that you cannot love somebody the way you want to be loved. You have to love them the way they want to be loved, and vice versa. And you guys have to learn each other's language."
Although initially, she and her husband had to make some adjustments and compromises when it came to their lifelong union, she learned that real love can come of a number of different packages and they won't all be something you're used to; and that's OK.
Watch the video of the actors' candid conversation with us below.
MICHAEL EALY REVEALS THE HARD LESSON HE LEARNED IN HIS MARRIAGEyoutu.be
The Intruder hits theaters on Friday!
Featured image by Instagram/@MichaelEaly.
Taylor "Pretty" Honore is a spiritually centered and equally provocative rapper from Baton Rouge, Louisiana with a love for people and storytelling. You can probably find me planting herbs in your local community garden, blasting "Back That Thang Up" from my mini speaker. Let's get to know each other: @prettyhonore.
ItGirl 100 Honors Black Women Who Create Culture & Put On For Their Cities
As they say, create the change you want to see in this world, besties. That’s why xoNecole linked up with Hyundai for the inaugural ItGirl 100 List, a celebration of 100 Genzennial women who aren’t afraid to pull up their own seats to the table. Across regions and industries, these women embody the essence of discovering self-value through purpose, honey! They're fierce, they’re ultra-creative, and we know they make their cities proud.
VIEW THE FULL ITGIRL 100 LIST HERE.
Don’t forget to also check out the ItGirl Directory, featuring 50 Black-woman-owned marketing and branding agencies, photographers and videographers, publicists, and more.
THE ITGIRL MEMO
I. An ItGirl puts on for her city and masters her self-worth through purpose.
II. An ItGirl celebrates all the things that make her unique.
III. An ItGirl empowers others to become the best versions of themselves.
IV. An ItGirl leads by example, inspiring others through her actions and integrity.
V. An ItGirl paves the way for authenticity and diversity in all aspects of life.
VI. An ItGirl uses the power of her voice to advocate for positive change in the world.
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Tracey Edmonds Dropped Her 'Anti-Aging' Self-Care Routine & We're Taking Notes
Aging is a beautiful process.
While society tends to pressure women to spend hundreds of nips, tucks, and miracle creams in search of the fountain of youth, adopting simple habits into our everyday lives can be the hidden key to aging gracefully.
From exercise, regular sleep, and a consistent skincare routine, these pillars of a healthy lifestyle can help us ease into every stage of life that lies ahead. And when we see women like Emmy-winning producer, Tracey Edmonds glowing and growing through her phrases of life, we can’t help but to take notes. That’s why we’re breaking down the 57-year-old’s top anti-aging tips on how to live a vibrant and healthy life.
Tracey Edmonds: 'My Anti-Aging Self-Care Routine'
Stay Hydrated with Lemon and Coconut Water:
“Water not only keeps you energized but it also cleanses you out — so you need to be drinking at least eight cups of water a day,” Tracey says in her video. “The other thing that you can add to water, which is actually amazing for you, is adding a squeeze of lemon or even a bit more to your water every single day.
“Lemon water is great for removing toxins, and it also tastes really good. It's very refreshing and it gives you that extra little burst of energy… it'll kind of almost wake you up a little bit,” she shares. “Coconut water has all the benefits of regular water and additional ones. It helps with high blood pressure and it's great for digestion.”
Exercise 3-5 Times a Week:
“We have to get our exercise in at least three to five times a week,” she advises. “Cardio is so important and it's great for heart health. When you get your body going and your energy flowing, you work better, you think better, you're more focused. So getting cardio is super important.”
Get Your Stretch On:
“I do a lot of stretching at least three times a week,” she says. “It's great for slowing down the aging process and keeping your body really agile with movement. And again, stretching is good for energy flow as well, it clears your chakra so that everything flows better in your body.”
Regular Cardio:
“Anything that actually gets your heart going is great for you. My cardio routine is running or walking on a treadmill at least three times a week. I run a mile each time I'm on the treadmill, so if you can do a mile each time you're on the treadmill, you are looking good, and your energy’s flowing, and keeping your body super healthy.”
Getting a Full Night’s Rest:
“I get at least eight hours of sleep. And yeah, it's hard sometimes especially when you're working and you have things on your mind or you're going through things with your personal life,” she says. “Sometimes when I have problems sleeping, I turn on my sound machine and listen to the sound of a river going by or something that helps relax my mind and removes all the other noise going on in my mind — like all the worries and anxieties and the work issues.”
Self-Care for Your Soul
“I do a lot of meditating and praying,” Tracey shares. “I meditate before I go into prayer and what that is for me is my time to spend with myself and with God. During my meditation/prayer sessions, I block out everything else. I find a really quiet spot, I close my eyes, and I just get in tune with God and where I need to go with my life. I solve problems a lot of times while I'm meditating and praying on them, and come out of meditation and prayer feeling clearer and more focused.”
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Featured image by Momodu Mansaray/Getty Images